Updated: Oct 7
Let me share part of my pregnancy story with you, a personal one that revolves around a pivotal decision I made during my second pregnancy and one that truly required me to trust my intuition.
At 37 weeks pregnant, I found myself faced with a difficult choice. I had been receiving care from midwives, but something didn't feel right. Deep down, I knew I couldn't continue with them. It may have seemed crazy to some, but for me, it was a clear and necessary decision.
Others questioned my choice, but I remained resolute. I didn't want to compromise on the kind of birth experience I envisioned. I had come across a quote by Robbie Davis that struck a chord with me – "You can want whatever birth you want, but if your caregiver does not share the same ideology, you're likely to get the birth that the caregiver wants you to have." I was determined not to let that happen.
Throughout my appointments with the midwives, I sensed that they were not fully supportive of my desire for a home birth, nor did they seem accustomed to attending such births. Instead of feeling empowered, I felt like I was managing their fears.
Finally, I reached my breaking point and decided to seek alternative care.
Through the recommendation of friends, I found a new birth attendant. We met several times before the birth, and it was evident that we shared the same values. I knew in my heart that she was the right person to support me on this rite of passage.
When my daughter decided to make her appearance, she did so in her own unique way – lips first, a rare face presentation baby! This made the birth more intense than my first, but she arrived healthy and beautiful.
Although I encountered challenges like a retained placenta and significant blood loss, one thing made all the difference – trust. I trusted myself, and the team supporting me, especially my birth attendant. It felt like a dance of confidence and understanding, knowing that if the need arose, transferring to a hospital would be okay.
Looking back, I realized that staying with my original midwives would likely have led to a completely different birthing experience – possibly even an unwanted C-section.
I can't express enough how important it is to know yourself, understand and gain knowledge of the kind of birth you desire and find a caregiver who shares your beliefs. This alignment of trust , intuition and confidence can truly shape your birthing experience, even if the outcome might not be exactly as planned. It's a lesson I carry with me and one that I hope can inspire other women on their sacred path from maiden to mother.